I was rummaging through some of my children’s old draft letters to Santa and I began to wonder which of my favorite herbs would be on Santa’s naughty or nice list?
I want to register a complaint about my placement on the naughty list. For years now, chamomile, rose and yarrow keep telling you I am the naughty one because I sting people when they are not looking. I can’t help it if I am all green, blend in and people brush up against me. Chamomile can cause some nasty allergies but who do they call when their nose runs or their eyes water? Me! And rose thinks she is so special because she was used in Shakespeare’s play, “Romeo and Juliet.” Oh “a rose by any other name would smell so sweet…” Juliet did not care that Romeo was a Montegue and I don’t care what rose’s name is! She still has thorns, much sharper than mine I might add. Yarrow, well that one is just plain over rated. She smells like a nasty wound and is not very good to eat. I taste like heaven compared to yarrow!
Santa, I know I can bite people but if that person happens to have swollen joints, that sting takes away the pain. I can be used as a food being a perfect protein and highest of all wild plants in calcium not to mention lots of chlorophyl. I can be made into a fertilizer helping other plants to grow. The fibers in my stem can be made into a thread to make fabric for clothing, my leaves can be used as a dye for the fabric and I can also be used for making paper. The juice of me can be used to seal wooden barrels or a repellant to flies and my seeds can be crushed to make an oil to burn in lamps. Now I ask you, is that one sting so bad compared to all I can do???? Hans Christian Anderson even featured me in a story that saved 11 princes from being swans forever!
Santa, will you please reconsider this year and take me off your naughty list? If so, all I really ask is for a nice calm spring with just enough rain and sunshine to really allow me to grow! I promise to warn humans when they walk by me. Thank you for your consideration.
PS I left you a bowl of warm nettle soup on the stove! Enjoy!